DOCTOR'S ADVICE - How can I please my wife?

Q. Doctor, I hope you can help my wife and me. I have read a lot about multiple orgasm, but she does not do that. I feel that if she could have repeated climaxes, it would help our marriage, which has been a little shaky recently. To tell you the truth, Doctor, last year she had an affair with a younger man. But now it is over. She has begged my forgiveness, and I have gladly given it to her.

I suspect that if things were better for her in bed, that would improve the marriage a great deal. My wife has talked wistfully about multiple orgasms, and I suspect that she had them with that young man last year. She has also read a number of romantic novels in which the heroine seems to climax easily over and over. Is that possible for a normal woman? I have watched one or two porn movies, and I have seen no sign that the women in them are having multiple orgasms. What do you think, Doctor? How could I help my wife?

A. The first thing I must say is that it would be a big mistake to imagine that multiple orgasms would automatically correct the problems in your marriage.

The fact that she had an affair with a younger man last year suggests to me that there are some fairly serious underlying marital problems. Wives do not usually have sex with younger men unless their marriages are in some degree of trouble.

However, I do congratulate you on what you have already done in keeping this marriage on the rails. To have forgiven your wife and kept the relationship going was a good and noble thing. But now I think you need to take matters further by persuading your wife to go with you to a marriage counsellor. A few sessions in the counsellor's office could pay rich dividends.

As it relates to multiple orgasms, a generation ago, many doctors thought that only few women could climax repeatedly. But these days. most 'sexperts' take the view that female physiology does allow multiple orgasm in a majority of women.

Two conditions are necessary for this to occur:

• 1. The woman must want to experience multiple orgasms.
  
• 2. The man must know how to bring her to these repeated peaks.

As to the first point, it does sound as though your wife really does want to enjoy multiple climaxes. Speak to her about it and find out what conditions would make it likely for her to achieve this.

Generally speaking, if women are going to have this experience, they need to feel very relaxed, romantic, appreciated and loved! The environment has to be absolutely right for them.

Turning to the second point, you really must make sure that when your wife has reached one orgasm, you then give her a few seconds - about 30 - for her to recover. After that, set about gently stimulating her clitoris in whatever way she prefers, taking care to keep everything well lubricated.

More advice on how to do this is now available on Fox News website. Just tap into your search engine: http://www.foxnews.com/ health/2010/11/01/female-orgasms-multiplication-easy.

Finally, you ask why women in pornographic movies do not appear to have multiple orgasms. I am told that this is because the artificial conditions of the studios provide no romance or love, and very little comfort. In fact, under these odd circumstances the actresses rarely manage to have a single genuine orgasm, let alone multiple ones.

Q. I am a 38-year-old female. Do I still have a chance of getting pregnant?

A. Yes, particularly if you have a regular period.

Q. I have been astonished to find that my husband has suddenly become keen on watching female wrestling on the Internet. But when I come into the room, he immediately switches it off.  What is going on? Is he getting a sexual thrill from this?

A. Almost certainly. There has been a sudden explosion of interest in female wrestling, particularly in the United States.

But in fact, the type of all-female grappling which is featured on the Internet, on a staggering 1.3 million sites, which usually involves young women in the nude. You may be a little surprised to learn that these female wrestlers spend a great deal of time trying to grope each other's genitals. This unlikely spectacle appeals to the more primitive desires of many male viewers.

Your husband is certainly not unusual in watching that. But maybe you should have a talk with him about why he is watching it, and why he feels the need to switch it off when you walk into the room.

Q I have been using a skin cream I bought online. I have since had a close look at the list of ingredients which are printed on the pack. I see that they include mercury. Could this be bad for me?

A. Very definitely! Mercury is a heavy metal, and it is poisonous. Unfortunately, it is contained in a number of skin creams that are sold to the unsuspecting public. Please stop using this cream right away.

Q Doctor, this is my third pregnancy. I had an ache in my back so I took some painkillers. Then I saw a report on the news which said that painkillers could damage the genitals of an unborn child. I was horrified. Have I hurt my child?

A.That is unlikely. The news item you heard was about some new Danish research which suggests that painkillers like aspirin, paracetamol and ibuprofen might cause male babies to have undescended testicles. However, so far the research is only based on a very small number of people. So it may or may not turn out to be correct. But that does not alter the fact that when a woman is pregnant, she should do her best to avoid taking any medication, except as recommended by her doctor or midwife.

Q I notice where in previous columns you have noted that men have fewer orgasms as they get older. Well, in my case, it is quite the reverse! I do not think I had many when I was younger. But now that I am in my 40s, and have fallen in love with a beautiful and exciting woman, I find that I am having more orgasms than ever before.

A. Well, good for you. I expect that this is because you are in love with a wonderful new partner. The fact remains that the frequency of orgasms do, generally, decline as you get older. However, the decline is very slow, and most men are still able to discharge at age 70.

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