Hello Mi Neighbour | How to engage in feel-good communication

Hope that we are all recovering nicely from Melissa and assisting others to recover just as nicely. Every pound of rice, “every pound of flesh” every pack of crackers, every tin of milk, every piece of board, and every prayer dedicated to the rebuilding of life and property of each hurricane victim is highly appreciated and will be greatly rewarded!

It is important at this time that (as they say in Jamaica) we begin to “see with one another”. Melissa has just discombobulated us. Merves are frayed. People are afraid, fearful, tired, frustrated, confused, hungry, impatient and angry as demonstrated in the behaviour of many.

At the same time, and understandably so, some persons are calm, at peace, patient, undisturbed, and even upbeat as they await the arrival of the silver lining behind the dark clouds. Among these are those who, though significantly affected by the hurricane, are sitting on cloud nine, eagerly awaiting the return of their Saviour Jesus Christ. They interpret these natural disasters and the plethora of current global phenomena as fulfilment of prophesies concerning the return of the Master. Check them out and “check in” as you could be left out.

MAKE COMMUNICATION EFFECTIVE, PAINLESS, AND WINNING

Now, let’s all work together to address and control some of those negatives that the hurricane could easily exacerbate. A very critical component of human existence is communication! Agreed? Of course! Yet as important as this is, it is responsible for much of the pain and misery in our world. How so? People do not understand the art of communication – how to make communication effective, painless, and winning. Especially at this time when so many Jamaicans are set on edge, it is of the utmost importance that our best communication skills be on display.

Three important things to bear in mind as we engage the process of communication are content, timing, and emotion. Could also throw in empathy and gender there for good measure, especially as we seek to communicate truth.

To engage in feel-good, yet frank and sensitive communication, we must understand our audience (be it one or many) and tailor our words accordingly. Be clear, concise, and VERY RESPECTFUL! Don’t laugh or become sad inappropriately as you communicate in this season. Put yourself in other persons’ shoes, and make sure that you attack the problem rather than the individual. Ensure that your end of the communication line does not include even an ounce of accusation! Follow? Try not to be didactic when trying to correct someone who may be hurting! Use phrases like ‘I think ...’ ‘from my perspective ...’ ‘I feel like ..’. ‘here’s what I’ve observed’. NEVER use phrases like ‘You always ...’ ‘You never ...’ ‘You’re wrong ...’. Even if they are wrong, don’t be blunt. Lead them down a path where they may discover their wrongness for themselves. They’ will be more likely to make adjustments.

As we communicate the truth, it is imperative that we do so with empathy and compassion. Think of how you would want to receive the message. Consider the timing and setting. Some people are easily embarrassed, especially in a crowd. Sometimes, it is best to meet privately once it is safe to do so. Focus on the issue, and avoid making assumptions or jumping to conclusions. Pay attention to the other person’s perspective and show that you are willing to understand where they are coming from. See where I am going? Don’t want to burden you with more verbiage as you have so much to do today for your family, friends, and neighbours.

Be blessed.

Again we ask that you

KINDLY HELP A NEIGHBOUR WITH ONE OF THE FOLLOWING

1. Stove

2. Refrigerator

3. Bed

4. Food

5. Help with medication

6. Financial assistance to start a little business

To help, please call Silton Townsend @ 876 649-9636 or deposit in acct #351 044 276 NCB. Alternatively, send donations to Hello Neighbour C/o 53 Half-Way Tree Road, Kingston 10; Paypal/credit card: email: zicron22@yahoo.com. Contact email: helloneighbour@yahoo.com. Visit hellomineighbourja.blogspot.com. Townsend exclusively manages the collections and distributions mentioned in this column and is neither an employee nor agent of The Gleaner.