Hiring a cleaner might lead to a happier relationship

It turns out love may benefit from a little less labour.

Couples who spend money on time-saving services – like getting takeout or hiring a house cleaner – report greater relationship satisfaction, especially during stressful periods, says Ashley Whillans, a behavioural scientist and professor at Harvard Business School.

Whillans studies the “tradeoffs people make between time and money”.

“When you spend money to save time – hiring an accountant, a babysitter, a cleaner – you feel more control over your life,” she said. “That sense of autonomy boosts well-being.”

Not everyone can afford to outsource bigger household chores. But Whillans says even a little bit can help. She advises couples to take a “time audit” – examining how they spend their hours and what small changes could reclaim even a few moments.

“People underestimate how much these choices matter,” she said. “It’s not about luxury – it’s about freeing up time to connect.”

Whillans’ team tracked busy, dual-income couples – partners working full-time who often report feeling time-starved – and found consistent patterns. In one six-week diary study, couples who made “time-saving purchases” on a given day were happier and more satisfied with their relationships.

USE THAT SAVED TIME FOR CONNECTING

Simply outsourcing chores isn’t a magic fix, however.

“It’s about being intentional with the time you get back – using it to spend quality time together, to reconnect,” Whillans said.

“Think of that half hour not as an opportunity to send more emails, but as a chance to spend time with your partner.”

Targol Hasankhani, a Chicago-based marriage and family therapist, stressed that while outsourcing domestic labour can ease daily stress, it doesn’t replace communication. Juggling careers and kids takes a toll on families, and housework is often freighted with resentments over who is doing it.

“If conflict around chores is rooted in something deeper – like inequity or not feeling heard – hiring a cleaner won’t solve that,” she said.

Couples must dig deeper to address problems with many layers.

“It opens up time and space, but couples still have to know how to show up for each other in that space,” Hasankhani said.

lifestyle@gleanerjm.com